My brother was my hero, the person I looked up to the most in my life. He had impeccable character, more than anyone I have ever known. My brother was my best friend, my hero. He was one of those incredible human beings that was smart, athletic, a dynamic Christian, fun and an all-around humble nice guy. He had flawless character in each and every aspect of his life. He was honest, kind and exhibited integrity in all that he did. He was Valedictorian of Yukon High School in Yukon, Oklahoma, All-State Baseball Catcher, Academic All-Stater, Second Team All-American, Player of the Year for the Oklahoman, Player of the Year for the Coaches Association and the Jim Thorpe Player of the Year, just to name a few. He had high aspirations to play college baseball, pro-baseball and eventually be an orthopedic surgeon. All of these goals were within reach. He was heavily recruited by Division I schools, and pro baseball scouts had planned on drafting him on June 4th. He was a guy that everyone loved and could relate to, not a cocky athlete or an unapproachable intellectual; he was amazing.
You might notice that I keep using the words “had” and “was.” My Mom and I received a phone call on June 3, 2002 that changed my life forever. This person, my brother, whom I looked up to more than anyone in my life, was driving his best friend and girlfriend home from work and was involved in a serious accident. It was 1:22 on a beautiful Monday afternoon, the Christian song “When the Rain Comes” was playing on the radio; it was just a normal day. As he was showing his girlfriend an easier route to get home, suddenly tandem wheels broke off of an 18-wheeler and came hurtling toward them at a high speed. My brother had just seconds to react and turned the wheel where his side of the car would receive the entire impact. The car spun violently out of control resting near a concrete wall; a second 18-wheeler behind his car went into a jackknife but, luckily, was able to stop. My brother, my hero, was killed instantly. His girlfriend and best friend received minor injuries and were able to open their car doors and get safely out of the car. My brother had to be removed with the Jaws of Life. My brother was credited with saving both of their lives… some commented that he was “blocking to the very end,” since he was a catcher. The newspapers called him a hero, but he was my personal hero every day in my life. The life I knew ended that day. We had an incredible close-knit loving family that was extremely happy. We were all shattered. We were all changed forever. I never knew that I could experience a pain so deep. The memorial service the night before my brother’s funeral brought 500 friends that told story after story of the tremendous impact he had on their lives. Over 2000 people attended his funeral. I read from my brother’s daily devotional in front so many people who loved him.
That day in June, I lost the person whose character I most admired, the person that I loved the most, and for me, this was a life-altering event. Through all of my grief, I made a conscious decision to not let this destroy me. My brother led such an incredible life in his short 18 years, and I knew I had to honor him and God with my own life. Through my daily tears, I became a better person, better student, better athlete, better Christian, better friend. I constantly had to remind myself that my brother would not have wanted his death to ruin my life, even though it easily could have. I chose the tougher path of living a life that would help others and be an encouragement and inspiration to those around me. My brother, my hero, prepared an incredible foundation for me that made my high school years easier. This life-altering event of losing my hero in my life became a tragic building block for the rest of my life.
10 responses so far ↓
Odale // November 28, 2007 at 11:39 am
God Bless You and Your Family. It’s wonderful beyond wonderful that you have not allowed such an event make you bitter and have instead drawn strength from Jesus.
Some things are just to difficult to understand and the worst part for me (as a mother) is not being able to do anything when my mother grieves over my two brothers (one, suscipious circumstances, one murdered 4 yrs later).
You have reminded me of something very important. I met a lady who lost her 16 yr old twins and her 18 yr old (who was driving) when an 18 wheeler ran over them from behind at a stop sign. It opened an opportunity for me to witness to her about God and made me realize we all suffer in this world, but it’s temporary.
Please forgive me if it seems I have minimized your sorrow b/c that would never enter my mind. You will be in my prayers to fulfill the purpose God has for you and to always lean on Him. I thank God for you as a Christian and a young person who is wise enough to “know”.
In His Love, Odale
Sue Hinson // November 28, 2007 at 7:56 pm
Wow, I am so touched and amazed by this and still think about what a wonderful young man that Justin really was…….
Hugs,
Sue
Jade Bailey // December 9, 2007 at 7:23 am
syd-you are an inspiration to me. i am so proud of you and i can honestly say that Christ shines through each and every move you make daily. i am so thankful for you and i love you dearly.
love, jade
Amy Quade // December 15, 2007 at 10:53 pm
Syd-precious little….wow you are one amazing creation of Christ. What you wrote touched my heart deeply. Thanks for it. You inspire me everyday and you shine with the love of Christ just like I am sure your brother did. Your compassion for your Savior and your friends around you is a true testament to your faith. I love you and am so SO thankful for you in my life. Keep on smiling and know you are a true Servant.
Jamie Lassiter // December 16, 2007 at 7:19 pm
Syd-
You are such a shining example for so many. You touch so many people’s lives not just in our sorority, but all over OSU’s campus. I am so happy that I have gotten the opportunity to get to know you. You inspire me and make me want to embrace life and all it brings. Thanks for sharing Justin’s story; he was truly an inspirational young man. I wish I could have met him. I love you and I am so happy that we are sisters. Keep your love shining bright for all to see!
Stacie Cadle // December 16, 2007 at 10:57 pm
On March 13th, 1986, I also lost my hero, my big brother in an automobile accident. He was 21 and I was 20. This past March was such a painful milestone because my brother has been gone as many years as he lived. However, like you…I am forever grateful for the years we had together. When I read about Justin in the paper today…I relived my own loss. My heart broke for you and your family all over again. I wish I could tell you that the pain will be easier in twenty plus years, but I would be lying. The pain never goes away, it just gets easier to accept the pain. I have a fifteen year old son who plays baseball at Edmond Santa Fe high school. I am ordering a couple copies of Chris Wall’s book for my son and his baseball coach. Thanks for sharing your “journey” with us.
God Bless You
John and Dar Harrison // December 28, 2007 at 3:17 am
Sydni, our son, Josh, is a big, tough airbourne Ranger now fighting in Afghanistan. He’s seen lots of casualties, including two of his closest friends. However, the loss that affected him the most was Justin. Even after all the years of separation, he still misses Justin, to the point where he said going back to Oklahoma just reminds him of wh0’s not their anymore. Our other son, Johnny, started his own journal after hearing Justin’s testimony at the funeral. Your brother really did set an example for all of us to follow!
Andrea Vaughn // February 26, 2008 at 5:05 pm
i love you syd. so much.
C. Jordan // February 27, 2008 at 9:44 pm
Justin was a very nice guy, i had a class with him, and he always made me smile!! I never wanted to read this stuff because i knew it would be hard, but when I heard about the book, I searched it and found your story. You are a very strong girl, i wish you the best in life! I am sure you make your brother proud everyday!
Larry Bryant // April 13, 2008 at 2:12 am
I got the first opportunity to look at this book at the Home Safe Bricktown game and concert.
I’m always looking for new material to teach and energize our youth at church. As I walked past the booth I couldn’t help but be drawn back to it to find out more about this book with a cool look and title. When I began to ask questions about the book I became very curious but didn’t commit to buying it that night. The next day all I could think of was this book and I immediately ran to mardel’s and picked one up. Let me just say WOW!!! God is all over this project and was all over Justin’s life. It has made me really search and study God’s word and has made me become more excited and longing for a closer relatioship with Jesus Christ then ever before. The only thing I can really say is, thank you to all who worked so hard on this and thank you God for Justin a man after your own heart that has given us a better look at how we need to be more focused on you.
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